Life has an uncanny way of making it difficult to know exactly where you’re going, or how you’re going to get somewhere. I’ve been trying to make my home-based business work out, however with the CPSIA, everything I’ve worked so hard at is going to be illegal or too expensive to continue if something doesn’t drastically change with it’s current provisions on required third party testing. I have considered changing product lines, however, that requires more capital. Capital which I do not have, money that I can not get.
K-Kitten will be 2 soon.
My household has been one big ball of raw nerve-endings. By the next payday we’re lucky to have any money left. The company I work for currently is in dire straights apparently and money is not going where it should in regards to health savings contributions and individual retirement accounts. That money being gone, it has devastated my household. Even trying to look for another position is difficult, as I know that we can not afford for me to be out of work. We can’t even afford to have to take unemployment at 80% of what I’m currently making. Getting a second job for either of us would mean putting K-Kitten into some sort of paid childcare, completely negating the second job in all likelihood.
That brings me to my fork in the road.
Which path do I take to continue safely and logically for my family’s sake? Which risk do I take that will reap the most benefit for them? Each path has risks at this point. Staying where I am, hoping that things get better, toughing it out the best we can and hope that it doesn’t last too long, or trying to move on and hope that I can find a position with as much flexibility and pay as I can. Either way I have to have a lot of faith in the outcome. I’m not sure we can afford for me to choose the wrong path. I’m pretty sure at this point there will be no going back and trying again.
K-kitten has grown so much. I’m so proud of the sweet toddler she is becoming (even when she’s throwing tantrums). I can’t help but think about what would be the best for her in any case. I don’t care what it means in regards to myself, but that she is taken care of is the most important. That includes keeping a roof over our heads, water and electricity flowing, food on the table.
At this point, we’ve been getting by with the extra cash I’ve been earning from my various methods. Without that small amount of income, I hate to think how much more in debt or how many overdraft fees we would have incurred. I’m still looking, hoping, and trying to find the best course forward. Nothing in life is certain I guess, but what do you do when you have so much at stake?
